writtern @10:46 PM

regarding my previous post, i didnt mean I'd DSA through badminton... i meant just like ask the coach for help or sth since i was alrdy in the cca... yeah people, im not good enough to DSA lah cann. lol.
anyways i've accepted being in JJC and its never gonna be possible to wear the sa uniform. haha. JJC'S GREAT MAN. ><
..JJC's fine lah. on friday i found out i was posted to qilu's/junxian.alex/zhengguang's class cause of my change in combi... and i started to realise tt most of my classmates were starting to get really comfortable with each other... ok maybe not MOST. there's like 7 of us -which is the biggest clique in our class cause everyone else just pairs up and disappears -.-" but we 7 were starting to get comfortable.. and then i had to leave ): sighh. i hope my new class will be fine..
oh yeah i received an air mail postcard from Trinity College Australia from chia hon. so nice(: i love receiving letters in the mailbox. hehe :D
went studying with lydia ytd. halfway through i got stressed because i cld only do 3/8 chem qns so i went down to citylink to buy a totally unessential yet overpriced item. and then she kinda told me off for wasting money. but i liked it! lol. i also saw a pair of nice shoes at VNC but they didnt have my size ): oh yeah girlies! VNC's having sales! once in awhile we all need retail therapy :D
At night was Diane's surprise birthday party & i was so shocked to enter the house & see Shu En in the same shirt as me. not only that, our entire dressing was almost exactly the same.we wore red spectacles, hoop earrings, that shirt and brown shorts. super cool lah. it was like a mirror reflection. haha. and then the DY's & I had our own mini sleepover PJ party! :D
i've been home alone with my maid & sometimes my granny for the past week. and tonight im gonna have my dinner on the balcony beside the garden then light some candles & meditate. my own romantic dinner, by myself. LOL. and then im gonna lie there & stare at the stars until im happy. enjoy life :D

writtern @2:28 PM

OMG. i so wanna KILL MYSELF.
i just found out my church friend appealed into SAJC after JAE posting through BADMINTON!!!
i almost fainted on the spot can.
sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t.
i thought it wld be useless to do it with badminton cause the badminton CCA isnt strong at all.. omg she isnt even DSA & got 15pts how did she get in?!?!
ahhh i hate myself for not trying... somemore i was in the team alrdy during first 2 mths i believe i wld have had a high chance.
SIGH :(

writtern @9:40 PM

im totally mentally drained & tired with insufficient sleep. its my addiction to the computer and habit of procastination. sigh.
Michelle from this day onwards shall start to mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug mug.
pay attention in tutorials. stay awake during lectures. do homework. not lag behind the rest of the whole school.
and im off to study nowww.



but in reality, you and i will never be.

writtern @6:40 PM

2H'04 finally had a gathering! the stupid game of pass the parcel. we were entertained by professional chicken dancers and exchanged hugs & kisses. i had to wash, brush & scrub my hands a gazillion times cause it was so ew, ew, ewww. x) i wish we can have more gatherings in the future! (:




about school now... AT LEAST the people in JJC are nice & friendly.
that all i can say.
lol.

writtern @4:55 PM

the WONDERFUL ppl of SAJC Saintallume
OG13 - our pretty pretty OLG SOPHIA, YUSONG's patting on my head and treating me like a lil sis or shld i said kid, JOSHUA & his snake, KIAN for being a sexy dance partner(i'll always rmb how we danced HAHAHA) and his 'eh, i really didnt see you this time!', TIEN's daoness, ZHIHAO & JIAHAO for confusing me all the time, HAOXUN for accompanying me in my crankiness, ROY and his suspenders for being nice, PAUL for being sweet too... im gonna miss the guys' entertainment.
As for the girls.. i love love love them & gonna miss them all too! and yup, im gonna miss all their SUANING too (:
07S25 - in particular JANICE for being my best classmate, MELISSA for ps-ing us, SIMRAN and her super-ultra long hair, KENBIN's permed hair x), DOM & ZIYOND's entertainment, FERDY for being such a gentlemen who went ard the whole canteen asking for tissues for me haha, MICHELLE cause she has the same name as me >< , and all BRIDGE players. ALL MY TEACHERS lyndon's PMS, RANDY GILL's perverted thoughts/actions
JESSLYN - im really gonna miss u babe.. the times you were there for me and vice versa ((: i regret not waiting for you more often :( we didnt even get to hang out in school tgt! make sure we keep in touch! <3
im also gonna miss
-the beautiful school building (super cool library, gambling den, nice CCs & LTs, the track, super nice Gallery & hall, SC)
-the condusive environment to study in
-the OH SO DELICIOUS FOOD in the canteen. the pattaya rice & the stall vendor's artwork of a MAYO FACE on my plate, chicken porridge-with lots of the brown & green stuff & pepper, the very colourful paper thosai, ice teh, sotong balls, hokkien mee stall are all YUMMY! and the fruit juices with fruits in them & and ice cream waffle! yongheng... dont put on weight hor, i know the food is GREAT man. haha.
-morning Gessian gathering at the Foyer. to wait for & be waited for
-self-entertaining ourselves during breaks
-after school hangout
-hangouts at the yummy dao-hui stall
-crossing the bridge(with a nice view) to SAS & SAJS, but nt so much of looking at the cute boys okay... lol
-cool high tech finger print attendance taking
-walks to the MRT station (pass the PAP & wave at the lil kids)
-SA, amarillo, saverdo's cheers
-wearing the niceee P.E shirt
i havent even gotten the chance to wear the nicest JC uniform/TEAM SAJC shirt yet!
One last time to step into SAJC :(

writtern @5:14 PM

ok i decided. the thought of being aus for 4 years straight is too scary. so no matter what subjects are thrown at me in SA arts im gonna accept it. yeah man, spore's the best! SAJC rocks too! :D
AH CRAP JJ JUST CALLED ME. dont noe whether i shld be happy or not. im already accepting ARTS! but the subjects JJ offer me arent wat i want... now i have to make another decision. CRAP I HATE MAKING DECISIONS.

writtern @3:56 PM

here's my situation from first to last preference and its gonna turn out like tt is i dont get a chance anywhere inbetween


SA sci -> SA arts -> CJC -> JJC -> poly -> PJ -> Trinity College Aus.


its a long story of twists & turns & detours of decisions since the JAE posting resutls but nw im 70% mentally prepared to go aus alrdy... or im trying to be brace myself & be brave gg there alone. but its the last resort cause im still afraid. appealing to JJC is alrdy bad enough cause i never considered going anywhere else besides SA & CJ... & i dont even want to go poly/PJ at all... but im trying to keep aussieland a last resort. my dady however prefers me to go there... and i tink its a great opportunity. only if either SA or CJ accepts me then i confirm staying here. if not... ):

writtern @10:00 PM

i can see... my future being screwed up.

and it dies ;

i dont know how i feel about anyone or anything else anymore.

i walk around & pretend everything's okay. Meanwhile, inside, im all numb, as if i had been buried in sadness and my body got free, but the rest of me is still in captivity.

writtern @6:14 PM

im not gg to complain much abt my current OG now because at the beginning its always like tt... everyone's still a lil quiet & shy. but it'll get better.. that i know...
but its really hell when even though u're in the same school, u cant be in the same faculty what more same OG as ur old OG mates. its really depressing. i meet old OG mates & classmates everywhere but im not in the same faculty as them and its SUCKS. some of them are in the same OG again..except me. and i dont know anyone from Arts fac besides peili lah. i mean i've made new OG friends, but... sigh. i was soo looking forward to being in the same OG as my previous OG mates again lah ):
okay honestly, im nt saying tt my orientation now sucks. its pretty fun & meeting new ppl is great... its just tt i had to get over my bad Olvl results & the fact tt i scored worse than expected + the fact tt im probably the only 1 out of 1000 ppl who scored worse for Os than prelims. i feel so..dumb. and now i feel even more inferior for dropping from science to arts.
when i reached home, i told my mommy abt tt incident with tt SICKENING CT and i burst out crying. i realised home is a very sad place. cuz usually no matter how sad i am, i cnnt cry outside. but once i step into the house, the water pipes burst. i managed to keep my tears back in school alrdy lah... den come home... haix. just thinking about the hopelessness makes me wanna cry lah. i tink i can give up nw alrdy... i just realised tt appealing to get into a school or transfer they dont even take into consideration bonus points... so no point having false hopes... :'(

writtern @9:04 PM

i cant believe i let yifan make me waste 1hr30mins of my life on the mrt train down 17 stations to Changi airport to watch planes flyoff. there goes my saturday afternoon thanks to his crazy idea. -.-"

writtern @11:00 PM

Gentlemanly guys make good first impressions :)

writtern @4:25 PM