things din turn out the way we wanted it 2 be... well. things that happen, happen fer a reason.
wats up wif that?!
whee~ learnt a new song.. Tong Hua... so niceeee. but such a sad song.. i cld cry listening 2 the lyrics... if u really listen 2 the meaning of the lyrics... man... sigh*


its you wen i look in the mirror;

writtern @2:56 PM

happy bdae 2 kenneth & wj... they finally turned 15. but im still older. whaha. bought a mini skateboard 4 wj.. wonders if he'll use it. haha.but its cutee. a grp of us went out ytd... watched Guess Who. it was so racist lah.. haha. den the guy was saying all the racist jokes... which i din quite understand. apparently none of us did. lol. i liked the part where they did the tango dance. "tango is a structure dance" the bad part is.. u dont noe how the sitting arrangement was lyk. ugh. sickeningggg. anw.. after the movie we walked ard den went 2 the arcade. played the.. wads tt game called? the table 1... den got the round round thingy u hafta hit into each others side... aiya. dunno wad its called lah. juz hope u noe which game im toking abt. haha. i played 1 on 1 wif jeremy.. the machine was cranky loh.. we restarted the game lyk FOUR times. so we played the game 4 times halfway... & i won all loh... although its nt a full game.. ok lah. din win all lah. at most i give jeremy win ONCE only. whaha. den the last & full game. in another machine which was in proper working condition. jeremy won me.. dunno wads the score.. din take note. juz noe i lost lah.. BUT overall i stil win ok.. whaha. jeremy is a sore loser.. keep saying u win... rrrubbishhh. I won ok. nt happy den we go out play again lah. whaha. BUT i'll still win! :) haha. & stop asking me who i was smsing or why i cried during a freaking cOmedy ok. haix. sad arh. my bill is lyk gonna explode loh.. ytd use so much. haha. anw thnx fer the so-called consolation. haha. AND stop lafing at my cooking ok. u aint betta! bleahx. i've cried over chao-da crab nuggets & failed sausages. i wonder wad im gonna cry over nxt in the kitchen. >.<

"its feels weird wen she's gone.. becuz its lyk i not complete... wif her i've felt wad its lyk 2 haf my other half"
sth lyk tt lah.. so touching.. but the father in law go copy wadeva Simon said loh.. so furnie. haha.

Thats wats going on... nth's fine im torn.
I’m wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
I’m all out of faith, this is how I feel
I’m cold and I’m ashamed bound and broken on the floor
You’re a little late, I’m already torn

writtern @4:00 PM

wahhhh. diz first week w/o a maid is driving me crazyyyy! i miss SITI!!!! nw i noe how much i love her after going thru hell. whaha. life is terriblee w/o her! fer the first time in my life, everyday i come home 2 an empty hse & hafta be home alone :'( & no one wld pick me up frm the bus stop on rainy days & i hafta run home under a small umbrella :( & worst of all, no one 2 cook fer me. sigh... but fortunately dis is the end of one week areadi. 3 more weeks. i haf been staying bac in skool fer almost the whole week except fri.. so my lunch was settled. cuz even if i dun eat in skool, my mom wont noe.. bt if i come hme after skool... my mom wld make sure i make my own lunch & eat sth -which means I hafta make my own lunch. i tried tt on friday. steamed the loh mai kai my mom bought & made crepe. but the crepe was horrible. tts my first failure in the kitchen. den on sat ytd, my second failure. i tried cooking lunch fer my 2 bros & myself. they were still slping so i decided 2 cook on my own. i defrosted the frozen crab nuggest & hash browns. den i cooked the rice & cut ham 2 fry wif the egg. the egg was quite alrite.. considering it being my first time frying eggs.i only knew how 2 break the egg into instant mee. hehe. anw.. instead of coming out in 1 piece, the egg was broken up lah. den i fried fishcake. which was super easy. tt was my only success. but duh.. anyone can juz throw the fishcake into the pan & ta-dah! done. den left the crab nuggest & hash brown 2 fry. i din noe where 2 start.. & i also din noe how much oil 2 put. den i tried frying the crab nuggets. disaster!!! one side was burnt. i din noe cuz i cut the nugget up & inside waas lyk red.. which i tot was raw... so i left it cooking.. BUDDEN CRAB MEAT IS SUPPOSED 2 BE RED!!! my bro told me lata. i was "dotz." i din noe it was supposed 2 be diz colour. den i got so bek chek wif the chao da crab nuggest tt i started crying. cried over chao da nuggets.-.-" cuz i was stressed areadi by the eggs. haha. den i went 2 wake my bro up ask him cook.. den he did the frying. i din dare 2 try 2 fry the hash browns myself. lata all burnt agn den dun need eat lunch areadi. god, im such a failure in the kitchen. haiz. & lydia says i sound lyk Paris hilton. tts such an insult man. im not as bimbo as her lah com'on. haix.
at nite we went out fer dinner wif the Poon family. man, they noe abt everything. we shared our dark secrets. & we realised our story was kinda same. the whole nite we were almost juz toking abt boys. haha. gossip gossip. heheh. earlier in the afternoon i was toking 2 Jermaine too... we were toking abt boys fer lyk so long. haha. gossip gossip. wah.. i gossiped a lot todae sia. anw after dinner we went 2 east coast beach. went ther 4 a drink & chat more lah. den we the 3 gals went 2 the breakwater(i tink tts wad its called?) & sat ther.. so lang man loh... we looked out into the sea under the moonlight... bt i tink we were making some noise tt disturbed other couples. heheh. anw we decided 2 call ourselves the "three-o reflection" haha. got inspiration fer the name frm the reflcetion of the water i tink. haha. three-o reflection. how does it sound? haha. anw den suddenly vicky screamed sth abt sth crawling towards us. den he screamed. den i screamed. den my hp slipped off my hand loh.. almost dropped into the water sia. lauz. heng.

anw how's diz blogskin? nice? finally changed! (=

writtern @6:59 PM

ahh. i really dunno whether 2 laf or cry sia... todae the talentime discussion juz got worst den ytd... & i tot ytd was bad enuff liao.. haha. we den sought help frm mr lam. gosh, even mr lam cldnt change his mind! its lyk.. he's so stubborn can.. he cant agree wif us on anything loh! so me & christina went 2 mr lam fer help. but even after an hr or so of persuading, it din work. god, we were lyk so pissed.
anw. the funnist thing which i cant stop lafing at is diz quotation frm sombody:
"They're all ganging up against me because im the lead singer & i can sing whereas they cant."
-.-" god. sOmEbOdY ShOOt me!!!
anw tmr's The-Day.
gosh, it'll be lyk sO embarrassing! dancing in poka-dotted skirts is even betta den sInggginggg!!! arghyy. & the worst thing is.. we STILL havent decided how we're gonna sing the song. so..hmm... i really haf no idea wads gonna turn out tmr. i pray tt a miracle will happen lah. a small miracle lyk juz HAVING HIM 2 AGREE WIF US on SOMETHING wld be nice. really. makes life a LOT easier. i juz hope we dun quarrel aGaIn tmr b4 the performance.
~
Wen i looked into ur eyes the moment which i let u go;i juz broke down.

writtern @9:32 PM

sigh. tired. ive been veh tired since my maid went back. i tink its becuz of the housework. nw i noe how tiring it is fer my maid. i din really do housework loh.. nth much i can help out wif ard the hse anw.. heheh. dunno izzit becuz of the housework tt im so tired lately. but i only took out the clothes out of the washing machine n hang them 2 dry only mah. gosh, im so weak! haix. anw im bek chek loh.. im reallllyyy angry wif mr lam. whyyy did he haf 2 make me join the talentime crap! argh. stpd loh... only 4 grps joined loh... thats y ALL 4 got into the so-called 'finals'. arghy. & i dare say our grp is the worst loh. we even planned 2 do really badly fer the auditions bt still we cldnt be disquallified. how i wish we cld be. dun wanna lose my face in front of so many ppl on fri. ugh. diz sucks. hate Lam. & todae we kinda quarrelled wif Bryan cuz of the song. haha. sigh. die lah. we're so nt prepared 4 fri lohhhh. arghyyy.

wat hurt me more was that i broke your heart.

writtern @9:43 PM

im lyk so pissed wif mr lam. i was pissed wif him areadi. nw im even MORE pissed. he's lyk obviously picking on me lah. & showing lwl favourtism loh. bakaaaa! i feel lyk strangling lwl also. argh. diz is so damn unfair. argh. dun care le, frm now on im gonna show lam attitude sia. also ask me replace ppl wen they nt happy. den lyk i happy lyk tt. wads his prob man?! baka. arghy. anw wadeva lah. cant be bothered. im nt gonna do 1% of my best fer the auditions. i hope we do really badly cuz i dun wanna perform! i dun tink the rest wans either anw. oh wadeva. sigh. todae my maid going back indonesia fer a break.. i cant imagine life w/o her fer a mOnTh! a mONTH u noe!!! nt a week! one week is areadi baddd. sigh. ive gotta be independent. ah-hem. i mean, mOre independent. i areadi am :)

That's when I decided
Why should I care
Cuz you weren't there when I was scared I was so alone
You, you need to listen I'm starting to trip,
I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone

Am I just some chick you place beside you to take somebody's place
when you turn around can you recognize my face you used to love me

writtern @12:16 PM

im lyk sooo pissed. wif Lam. he's biased. hmph. i hate him. i used 2 tink his lesson was the most fun. hmph. nw i hate him & his lessons. i want my rightful seat & rightful partner back! i was lyk so freakinnn happy wen lam changed our seats on fri lohh. i was finally moved 2 the back of the class! then khaaalishhh had 2 change zarina wif ME. ugh.nw im at the end, quarantined, & w/o a partner 2 sing 2! ugh. zarina was unhappy wif her seat. nw Im unhappy sitting at her seat! wth. diz is lyk injustice cannn. ugh. biAsEd. i cant stand nt having some1 beside 2 tok 2 & crap n in class & SING 2! act the seat nt bad lah.. bt my RIGHTFUL seat wld be soo much betta. i'd haf more ppl 2 play wif. haiix. tink abt it wanna cry again lohh... fri wen i realised my seat was changed i went 2 jess crying. lols. i noe its a small matter... but... haiix. nvm. i'd juz haf 2 be my own audience 2 my singing :/ ok.. i've complained enuff tonite le.. complain 2 jeremy until tired areadi. haiix. i wish i'd get sick. i predict i'd get sick diz week cuz i stood inthe rain fer 20mins juz nw. gt drenched. i wanna get sick. hope i get hospitalised. arghy.
depressed.

im gonna smie lyk nth's wrong. im gonna tok lyk i dont mind. im gonna act lyk im happy. im gonna laugh lyk life's beautiful. im gonna pretend tt everything's perrrfect.

writtern @9:55 PM

wats tt all abt? e way ur treatin' me




some people stop n some people stare//.
im hearing whispers that younolongercare.

writtern @8:26 PM

we pray fer the Pope's health. †





can`t believe i had a gurl lyk u n i juz let u walk outta my life
after all I put u thru u still stuck around & stayed by my side.

[[what really hurt me is I broke ur heart__ ]]

//baby you were a good girl and I had no right, I really wanna make things right

writtern @9:52 PM

haiiz. i cried again fer the second time todae. i dont geddit. y am i so unlucky. mr lam changed our seats todae. im still sitting wif LWL. i was sooo happyyyy 2 be sitting wif him... cuz in diz case, i am looking at the brighter side of things. i cld haf been put wif someone worst. but anyway. its even betta nw tt we are put wayy behind at the back of the class! tts double joy! i cldnt be anymore happier. butttt lwl juz told me some VERY VERY bad news. its abt our seating. we wld be separated. i tink we shld noe on monday bah. haiiz. juz nw after skool i was doing cme. my grp members all ps me. ugh. lucky i gt jess 2 help me. i lurrvee u gal. & i chiong-ed my ss essay but forgot 2 hand in!! so dead. i wanna kill myself le. after skool i found out some stuff. come 2 tink of it... it was all my fault... it really was all my fault. bt the thing is, i tried. I tried. who's the 1 tt didnt?! bt it wldnt even become lyk tt if it werent fer my stubborn-ness. arghy. after hearing tt, i wanted 2 cry rite den. but instead i held it in & had 2 exclaim tt im alrite & im fine & im happy & im feeling great & it doesnt affect me at all. who am i trying 2 kid?! the tears started rolling wen i gt onto the bus home. sigh. & tt stpd lwl is lyk telling me 2 look forward cuz its the weekend. bt diz weekend wld be the first in my life tt i wld nt be glad. i wanna go skool. i cant wait till monday fer the bad news. & i wldnt even enjoy diz weekend cuz i'd juz keep tinking & tinking. im paranoid.


its hard 2 leave the m3morie.z behind. //trying_

writtern @8:58 PM